Friday, April 29, 2005

Annals Of Annoying Commercials

I hate the Nazonex bee commercials. What kind of Eurotrash accent is he speaking?

Worst of all...
the Nasonex bee bears a freakish resemblance to Brooke Adams

Am I the only one who sees this?

Thursday, April 28, 2005

By The Shores Of Gitchie Gumee



Professor Pants-On-Fire, a.k.a. Ward Churchill, the duplicitous ethnic studies professor at the University of Colorado deigned to be interviewed by Matt Labash in the 4/25/05 issue of The Weekly Standard.

Let me warn those of deficient reading skills...the article is 13 pages long, but it is both hilarious and a dead-on analysis of the fraud that is being perpetrated by this wannabe Hiawatha. It is here and most definitely worth the read. Here's a taste:

AIM activist and real American Indian, Earl Naconie, was asked what he thinks of Churchill's Indian name, which is "Keezjunnahbeh," meaning "kind-hearted man."

Neconie shrugs. He hadn't heard of it. "But Bay Area Indians, we have our own name for him. We just call him Walking Eagle."

"Why?" I ask.

"Because," says Neconie, gathering up his placards, "a Walking Eagle is so full of s--that it can no longer fly."

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Not An Item!

Who is not a cozy couple?

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie on a secluded beach in Morocco?

No...

We're talking about President Bush and Saudi Arabian Crown Prince Abdullah seen holding hands while tiptoeing through the bluebonnets at the Crawford Ranch.



I'm no expert, but apparently cheek kissing & holding hands is the custom in the Middle East for expressing a warm greeting.

So Laura doesn't have to worry...

Monday, April 25, 2005

Apoptoadsis


Scientists in Hamburg, Germany, are baffled by the strange deaths of hundreds of toads after they apparently exploded in and around a pond, according to a Local 6 News report.

As many as 1,000 toads have died after their bodies swelled to bursting point and then exploded. The area around the pond in Hamburg has been cordoned off as experts investigate the dead toads.

Scientists are looking at a fungus that may have been spread by foreign race horses from a nearby track, however, another likely culprit may be Hamburg's unusually large flies.

Saturday, April 23, 2005

New Coke Bad Coke



20 years ago today, New COKE was unleashed onto an unsuspecting public...

And the slogan, "The best just got better", went on to became famous last words in advertising.

Classic COKE was reintroduced on July 11, 1985.

Wow. 20 years already...

Tempus fugit.

Friday, April 22, 2005

Eewwww!

Just when you think you've seen the bizarre, something more bizarre comes along..

A housewife in Myanmar is breastfeeding two Bengal tiger cubs!

Three times a day, she schleps to the Yangon Zoo where she breastfeeds the hungry black-striped, orange-brown cubs rejected by their natural mother.

"The cubs are just like my babies," the courageous but not overly bright, Hla Htay told Fuji TV as one of the baby big cats suckled her breast.

Three cubs were born at the zoo in mid-March, but their mother killed one and refused to nurse the others. Veterinarians rescued the other two but had little success bottle feeding them.



The zoo says the breastfeeding will stop by the end of April or when the cubs start teething -- whichever comes first.

Yikes!

Thursday, April 21, 2005

World's Largest Floating Object

No, not Michael Moore...heh heh

Seriously, it is B-15A, a 71 mile long iceberg that collided with Antarctica and broke off a city-sized chunk of the continent, forcing maps of the bottom of the world to be redrawn.

click here for big photo

The iceberg slammed into the Drygalski ice tongue, which sticks out into the McMurdo Sound on the Ross Sea. The tongue is about 44 miles long. Or at least it was.

Scientists predict that more collisions between B-15A and Drygalski are possible.

The back history of the iceberg makes for fascinating reading at livescience.com

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

The German Shepherd


Pope Benedict XVI is already being called many names... some not so nice so I won't repeat them here.

B16 is OK for short, but my favorite has to be The German Shepherd.

How cool is that?

Moore Bellyflop?

Millionaire "documentary" filmmaker, Michael Moore vehemently denies bellyflopping into the Atlantic Ocean in the vecinity of the cruise ship, Norwegian Dawn, that was hit by a freak 70 foot wave, which sent furniture sailing through the air, knocked Jacuzzis overboard & flooded 62 cabins.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Shat Happens!


From our friends at www.splitreason.com comes the perfect gift for the Trekker in your life...

or if you just want to buy it for yourself... *wink*wink*

Go here to order your very own Shat shirt.

Nothing Is Sacred



While the Papal Conclave continues and the multitudes watch the smokestack for the white smoke, rest assured that there are bookies giving odds and taking bets for the next pope here

Interestingly enough, the Cuban Cardinal, Jaime Lucas Ortega y Alamino, is listed as having 50-1 odds. If he could do for Cuba what Pope Jean Paul II did for Poland, he would get my vote.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Chinese Ballet


A Chinese ballerina balances on her toes on top of the head of a male dancer during the dress rehearsal for Swan Lake the Acrobatic. The show, billed as the first ever acrobatic ballet, staged its world premiere in March and highlights the innovative combination of Western dance and ancient Chinese acrobatics.

Swan Lake the Acrobatic, is currently in hiatus while Mr. Chen Lee receives treatment for cervical spondylosis.

Producers for the show are said to be rethinking the whole acrobatic ballet concept.

Friday, April 15, 2005

Cat Shooting Shot Down


A proposal to legalize the killing of feral cats in Wisconsin is not going to succeed, Gov. Jim Doyle said today. "I don't think Wisconsin should become known as a state where we shoot cats," said Doyle, a Democrat who neither hunts nor owns a cat. "What it does is sort of hold us up as a state that everybody is kind of laughing at right now." (Kind of like Florida, but that's another post)

So you kitties can come out of hiding now.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

When Pigs Swim?


Midget pigs compete in swimming race at Pig Olympics Thursday in Shanghai, China.

Who knew?

Just the other day I was asked to participate in a phone survey. I said I would when pigs swam in the Olymics.

Ooo-kay. Now I have to think of another default telephone solicitor excuse...

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Sniper Cats

Feral cats in Wisconsin take the law into their own hands ...er, paws in response to Monday night's vote on whether to give hunters the right to shoot feral cats that are attacking birds.



"I think the feral cat is truly a wild animal and very destructive to wildlife,” said Wisconsin hunter Terry Hines. "And now, feral cats will kill people, too."

On the ballot was whether to designate free-roaming feral cats as an unprotected species. A free-roaming domesticated cat would be defined as one without a collar or a cat not under the owner’s direct control.

To become law, the measure would have to go through the Department of Natural Resources and the Wisconsin State Legislature.

Water On Mars!


This is the April Fool's day photo from NASA's dazzling Astronomy Picture of the Day site

Who says NASA doesn't have a sense of humor?

Monday, April 11, 2005

BBC Out Of Touch.

Another sign of MSM slippage:

In an email recently sent to the Bob Marley Foundation, the BBC asked to interview reggae star Bob Marley for a documentary on his hit song "No Woman Can Cry", reports Ananova.com.

The BBC said the interview would would involve the Jamaican reggae legend "spending one or two days with us," and added, "it would only work with some participation from Bob Marley himself."

Unbekownst to the BBC, Bob Marley died of cancer 24 years ago! The BBC has admitted to being "very embarassed" about the incident and has apologized to the Marley Foundation.

The BBC quickly cancelled plans for its upcoming concert,"A Gala Rocking Extravaganza" starring rockers Janis Joplin, Freddy Mercury, Jimmy Hendrix, & Neil Young. Apologies have also been issued to the Joplin Foundation, the Mercury Foundation, the Hendrix Foundation, and Neil Young, who's career is on life-support, but who, as far as everyone knows, is still very much alive.

Earth to BBC.

Thursday, April 07, 2005

A New Low For Dax


My dog, Dax, vomited into her food bowl today! Right into several cups of Pedigree Digestive Care chow.

Bleccch! Lucky for you I did not whip out the digital camera & share the sight with the blogosphere.

Has anyone ever heard of a dog doing that?

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Another Bogus Memo?



All 55 Republican senators say they have never seen the Terri Schiavo political talking-points memo that Democrats say was circulated among Republicans during the floor debate over whether the federal government should intervene to prolong her life.

A survey by The Washington Times found that every Republican said the memo was not crafted or distributed by him or her. Every one of them said he or she had not seen it until the memo was the subject of speculation in major news organs, particularly ABC News and The Washington Post.

Some Democratic spokespeople say news outlets have investigated and authenticated the memo and that it came from Republican sources, however, they do not respond to a request to name the newspaper or network that had "authenticated" the memo.

What's next...that we find out the memo was typed on a 1972 IBM Selectric?

Was Marla Mapes in the building?

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Mr. Evil


click here for larger picture
and the full story of Clinton and his cabinet monkeys...

Former Clinton national security adviser and Kerry campaign adviser Sandy "I'm evil" Berger, for lying after stealing highly classified documents from the National Archives -- in an apparent attempt to alter the historical record on terrorism, no less -- will get a small fine and slap on the wrist. He will pay $10,000 and get no jail time.

Martha Stewart was scrubbing toilets in prison for less.

One can only speculate as to why the Department of Justice would agree to such lenient terms for such a serious offense. What favors were called in or who got squeezed and with what is unknown. One thing is certain, the Clinton administration is still emitting the foul stench of corruption.

An honest mistake? Not a chance.


[The BLOG hat tip to aaron's cc for the monkey pic]