Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Make Me Laugh

I agree.

Quick. Someone tell me a joke.


Sandee said...

Four friends spend weeks planning the perfect desert camping and riding trip.
Two days before the group is to leave Rob's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.

Rob's friends are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do. Two days later the three get to the camping site only to find Rob sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and supper cooking on the fire. "Dang man, how long you been here and how did you talk your wife into letting you go?"

"Well, I've been here since yesterday. Yesterday evening I was sitting in my chair and my wife came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and said 'guess who'?"
I pulled her hands off and she was wearing a brand new see through nightie. She took my hand and took me to our bedroom. The room had two dozen candles and rose pedals all over. She had on the bed, handcuffs and ropes! She told me to tie and cuff her to the bed and I did. And then she said, "now, you can do what ever you want."

So here I am.

cube said...

I can see some time in the dog house for that.

Jan said...

Two baby seals walked into a club.

cube said...

Jan: Hello. That's not a joke. I mean unless one of the seals was really shortsighted ;)

messymimi said...

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

Sorry, it's the best i can do on short notice.

Cruisin Paul said...

A Lesson in Government

A teacher was teaching her second grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her her students to ask their parents what the government is.

When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and ask his what the government was.

His dad thought for a while and answered, ''Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the work force, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.''

''I still don't get it'' responded the Little Johnny.

''Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,'' said the dad.

''Okay then...good night'' said Little Jonny went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, ''OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the work force, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!''

I hope that you enjoy the joke Cube. Have a wonderful Thursday. See ya.

Cruisin Paul

Woodsterman (Odie) said...


DaBlade said...

I'll keep trying!

Kid said...

2 jokes.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

A blond woman gets stopped by a blond woman police officer. Officer says I need to see your license. Driver says What does it look like? Officer says it's square and has your picture on it. Driver ruffles through purse and pull out her compact. Here you are.
Officer opens it up, look in and says Oh, I didn't realize you were a police officer, you can go.

cube said...

Messymimi: You get kudos for a joke, not a great one, but it did give me a giggle. So thank you for cheering me up,.

cube said...

Paul Pietrangelo: Yes, I'm grinning. Thanks for the humor.